PROFESSOR PENDLETON'S EXPERIMENT (Humorous tale by Guilherme de Faria)

Dear Facebook friends, I will now tell you about a strange realistic dream, althoug out of time, that happened to me in my sleep tonight. I immediately classified it as a "typical English dream", you will soon see why. Here is the dream that came to me in the form of a report addressed by me to the honorable commission of admission to the Royal Academy of Sciences of the United Kingdom, in the year of Her Majesty of 1826:
"Dear and distinguished members of the Royal Academy of Sciences.
Today, 6 Tuesday, I, Dr William Clark, accompanying Professor James Pendleton, postulant to the title of Academic of the Royal Academy, at dawn, in a rented cabriolet pulled by a single horse (with the modest public money made available by Your Lordships) , we headed (my self as a witness chosen by professor Pendleton) to Hide Park where the doctor intended to carry out the unprecedented experiment that would confirm two of the main laws of our honorable founder, the great Sir Isaac Newton.
At six o'clock sharp, having dismounted us from the cabriolet, and placed us in front of the rising sun, adequately wrapped in our black cloaks and covered by our double-curled white wigs, in an appropriately symbolic attitude regarding the grandiose extension of our glorious Empire British in which the sun never sets, professor Pendleton picked up a stone the size of a fist and after making sure I was attentive, with eyes wide open, in a movement that I would say elegant, he threw it with his maximum strength towards the East. The projectile covered an approximate distance of thirty yards, making a descending parable towards the carpeted ground of weeds and some graceful flowers, damaging them. In this way, two of the laws of our great founder Sir Isaac Newton were simultaneously and empirically proven: the law of Inertia and the law of Gravity.
Back at the headquarters of our Honorable Society, with the Council gathered, after our Left Hand Oaths of Truth (we are English) on the King James Bible, with my trustworthy testimony, we report in detail our remarkable experiment. After a brief deliberation, the Honorable Council decided to honor the professor James Pendleton as a new Academic of the Royal Society A.R.S.
Long live the King! "
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07/04/2020